Always be humble and gentle. Be patient with each other, making allowance for each other’s faults because of your love.
Ephesians 4:2 NLT
Kindness is one of those words that sounds soft —
until it costs you something.
It’s easy to be kind when people are agreeable, grateful, and emotionally tidy. It’s harder when they’re abrasive, dismissive, or just plain wrong on the Internet. (Yes… that comment section.)
Scripture doesn’t describe kindness as a personality trait or a mood. It describes it as a choice.
And like forgiveness, kindness is rarely a one-time decision. It’s a posture we return to. A daily yes. Sometimes an hourly one.
Kindness Is Not Weakness in Disguise
Let’s clear this up before religious legalism sneaks in wearing a smile.
Kindness is not conflict avoidance with spiritual perfume. It doesn’t mean silence when truth is needed. It doesn’t mean surrendering wisdom or healthy boundaries.
Jesus was kind — and He also overturned tables, asked uncomfortable questions, and spoke truth without flinching.
Kindness is not the absence of strength.
It is strength submitted to love.
Kindness says:
I could react… but I choose to respond.
That choice places us back into the rhythm of the Kingdom instead of the reflex of the flesh.
Kindness Begins in the Heart
Here’s the part we’d rather skip:
Unkindness is rarely about the other person.
It usually flows from hurry, offense, fear, or self-protection. When those take the wheel, kindness is often the first thing tossed into the back seat.
We justify it with phrases like:
“I’m just being honest,”
or
“They deserved it.”
(Honesty without love has a way of becoming cruelty with Scripture taped on.)
“Since God chose you to be the holy people he loves, you must clothe yourselves with tenderhearted mercy, kindness, humility, gentleness, and patience.”
Colossians 3:12 NLT
You don’t accidentally put on kindness.
You choose it — sometimes while everything in you is reaching for sarcasm instead.
Kindness as a Kingdom Practice
Kindness isn’t just fruit.
It’s formation.
Every act of kindness trains the heart.
It loosens our grip on self-importance.
It reminds us that people are not interruptions to our lives — they are the assignment.
Most of the time, kindness looks painfully ordinary:
- Pausing before responding
- Listening without correcting
- Letting someone else have the last word
- Offering grace when you’re convinced you’re right
Small decisions.
Eternal weight.
Kindness and Prayer Are Connected
Jesus consistently linked spiritual authority with relational posture. Faith, prayer, forgiveness, humility — they all travel together.
When our hearts grow sharp, prayer often feels stalled. When we choose kindness, something softens.
Not because we earn God’s favor —
but because we align with His nature.
God is kind.
Not occasionally.
Not conditionally.
Consistently.
“But when the kindness and love of God our Savior appeared, he saved us…”
Titus 3:4–5 NLT
Kindness isn’t just something God does.
It’s who He is.
Choosing It Again
So maybe today the prayer isn’t:
“Lord, change them.”
Maybe it’s:
“Lord, soften me.”
Kindness doesn’t always change the situation.
But it always shapes the soul that chooses it.
Kind people choose kindness again.
Loved people love forward.
And sometimes the most countercultural act in a reactive world is to quietly, deliberately choose kindness — again.
Prayer
Holy, loving and merciful Father,
I choose kindness — not because it’s easy, but because You are kind to me. Show me where my heart has grown sharp or defensive. Teach me to respond from love, not reaction. Let my words, my tone, and my actions reflect Your nature today. I receive Your kindness, and I choose to give it away.
In Jesus’ Name, amen.
“Be kind to each other, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, just as God through Christ has forgiven you.”
Ephesians 4:32 NLT
Igniter Ministries 