And as we live in God, our love grows more perfect. So we will not be afraid on the day of judgment, but we can face him with confidence because we live like Jesus here in this world.
1 John 4:17 NLT
Purpose of This Training
To form house church leaders who live and lead like Jesus in relational, Spirit-led communities by practicing the pathway of Trust → Listen → Obey, resulting in confidence, competence, compassion, and Christ-like character.
This training is not platform-oriented or program-driven. It is presence-centered and multiplication-focused, shaping leaders who shepherd people in homes the way Jesus formed disciples in everyday life.
Big Idea
Healthy leadership flows from a healthy relationship with God.
When leaders trust God, listen well, and obey faithfully, they grow into leaders who lead with confidence, competence, compassion, and Christ-like character.
Training Outcomes
By the end of this training, small group leaders will:
- Understand leadership as spiritual parenting and shared discipleship, not control or performance
- Practice the Trust → Listen → Obey pathway personally and within their gatherings
- Grow confidence to facilitate Spirit-led meetings rather than scripted ones
- Lead communities marked by love, participation, and mission
- Commit to rhythms that multiply healthy disciples, not dependent attenders
Part 1: How Jesus Lived and Led
Gospel Moments That Frame Jesus’ Leadership
- Baptism (Matthew 3:13–17): Jesus begins ministry secure in the Father’s love (identity before activity)
- Wilderness Temptation (Matthew 4:1–11): Jesus leads from trust and obedience, not shortcuts or self-promotion
- Calling the Disciples (Mark 3:13–15): Jesus leads relationally — inviting people to be with Him before sending them
Key Scriptures: John 5:19; Luke 2:52; Mark 1:35; John 13:1–17; Philippians 2:5–8
Jesus’ Leadership Pattern
Jesus:
- Lived secure in the Father’s love (confidence)
- Discerned what the Father was doing (competence)
- Was moved with compassion toward people
- Acted consistently with holy, self-giving character
He didn’t lead from pressure.
He led from abiding relationship.
Key Insight:
Jesus didn’t try to act Christ-like. He lived relationally with the Father — and character followed.
Part 2: The Relational Pathway — Trust → Listen → Obey
1. TRUST — The Foundation
Key Scriptures: Proverbs 3:5–6; Isaiah 26:3; John 15:9–10; 1 John 4:16–18
Jesus’ Life Moment: The Father’s Voice at His Baptism
- Text: Matthew 3:16–17
- Jesus hears affirmation before He performs a single miracle
- His ministry flows from belovedness, not achievement
Leadership Formation Insight:
Leaders who are secure in God’s love lead with confidence, not control.
Leadership Impact:
- Reduces fear-based leadership
- Builds internal security instead of image management
- Frees leaders from control and defensiveness
Team Reflection:
- Where do we lead from trust?
- Where do fear, urgency, or control show up instead?
2. LISTEN — Relational Discernment
Key Scriptures: John 10:27; Psalm 85:8; James 1:19; Acts 13:2
Jesus’ Life Moment: Solitude and Prayer
- Text: Mark 1:35; Luke 5:15–16
- Jesus withdraws to listen before making decisions or responding to demand
- He discerns direction before action
Leadership Formation Insight:
Listening precedes wise leadership. Silence is not inactivity — it is alignment.
Listening includes:
- Listening to Scripture
- Listening in prayer
- Listening to the Spirit
- Listening to people
Leadership Impact:
- Sharpens discernment
- Improves decision-making
- Builds shared spiritual awareness
Team Practice (5 minutes):
- Sit in silence
- Ask: “Lord, what do You want our team to notice right now?”
- Share briefly without discussion
3. OBEY — Love in Action
Key Scriptures: John 14:15; John 15:14; Romans 12:1–2; Hebrews 5:8
Jesus’ Life Moment: Gethsemane
- Text: Luke 22:39–46
- Jesus honestly wrestles, then chooses the Father’s will
- Obedience flows from trust, not suppression
Leadership Formation Insight:
True obedience often follows surrender, not certainty.
Biblical obedience is:
- Relational, not transactional
- Often small and specific
- Formational before it is functional
Leadership Impact:
- Builds spiritual authority
- Forms integrity and trust
- Aligns action with God’s heart
Key Insight:
Obedience is not proving loyalty — it is practicing alignment.
Part 3: The Four Leadership Fruits
1. CONFIDENCE — Rooted in Abiding Love
Key Scriptures: 1 John 4:17; Hebrews 4:16; Romans 8:15–16
Jesus’ Life Moment: Calm Authority Under Pressure
- Text: Mark 4:35–41
- Jesus remains at peace in the storm
- His confidence rests in trust, not circumstances
Confidence is the fruit that grows when disciples live from abiding love instead of self-reliance. Rooted in trust, it brings calm authority under pressure, like Jesus at peace in the storm.
This confidence is not shaped by circumstances or outcomes, but by settled assurance in the Father’s care, freeing disciples to act without fear or striving.
2. COMPETENCE — Grown Through Discernment and Practice
Key Scriptures: Luke 2:52; Colossians 1:9–10; Hebrews 5:14
Jesus’ Life Moment: Choosing the Twelve
- Text: Luke 6:12–13
- Jesus prays all night before making a strategic leadership decision
- Competence flows from discernment, not impulse
Competence is the fruit that grows as disciples learn to listen and respond faithfully over time. Shaped through discernment and practice, it reflects wisdom rather than impulse and faithfulness rather than control.
Like Jesus choosing the Twelve after prayer, this competence flows from alignment with the Father, enabling disciples to act wisely without needing certainty or mastery.
3. COMPASSION — Love That Moves Toward People
Key Scriptures: Matthew 9:36; Luke 7:13; Colossians 3:12–14
Jesus’ Life Moment: Moved with Compassion
- Text: Matthew 9:35–36; Mark 1:40–41
- Jesus sees, feels, and acts
- Compassion is not weakness — it is divine strength expressed relationally
Compassion is the fruit that grows when disciples remain open and present to God and others. Free from self-protection, disciples are able to see, feel, and move toward people with love, as Jesus did when He was moved with compassion.
This compassion is not sentimental, forced, or rushed, but steady and courageous, expressing God’s heart through embodied care.
4. CHRIST-LIKE CHARACTER — Integrity Over Time
Key Scriptures: Galatians 5:22–23; Romans 8:29; 2 Corinthians 3:18
Jesus’ Life Moment: Faithfulness to the Cross
- Text: Philippians 2:8; Luke 23:46
- Jesus remains obedient, loving, and trusting to the very end
- Character is revealed under maximum pressure
Christ-like character is the fruit that forms through repeated trust, listening, and obedience over time. It is revealed most clearly under pressure, where love, humility, and faithfulness endure.
Like Jesus’ obedience unto the cross, this character is not performed but formed, shaping disciples whose lives increasingly reflect the way of Christ in every season.
Part 4: House Church Leadership Culture
Culture We Are Forming
- From teaching-centered → presence-centered gatherings
- From leader-driven → Spirit-led participation
- From control → relational trust
- From spectators → equipped disciples
- From burnout → abiding and shared leadership
House Church Reality:
People will reproduce what they experience, not just what they are taught.
Healthy house churches flow from leaders who model trust, listening, and obedience.
Part 5: Practical Rhythms for House Church Leaders
Anchor Scriptures: Acts 2:42–47; John 15:4–5; 1 Corinthians 14:26; Psalm 127:1
Weekly Gathering Rhythm
- Begin gatherings by grounding the group in God’s love (identity before activity)
- Practice shared listening: “What is the Spirit highlighting?”
- Encourage short, obedient responses rather than long discussions
Leader Rhythm (Personal)
- Daily prayer: “Lord, where are You inviting me to trust You today?”
- Weekly reflection: Where did I listen and obey this week — and what fruit followed?
Monthly Rhythm (Community)
- Celebrate stories of obedience and love
- Discern together where God may be sending the community
Part 6: A Reproducible Training Every House Church Can Pass On
The Vision
This training is designed to be simple enough to reproduce, deep enough to transform, and relational enough to fit any home.
The goal is not to create experts, but faithful facilitators who help others learn how to trust God, listen to the Spirit, and obey together.
What is practiced in the living room can be multiplied in another living room.
The 4-Session Reproducible Training Pathway
Each session can be run in 60–75 minutes and repeated as new leaders emerge.
Session 1: Identity and Trust — Leading from Belovedness
Gospel Moment: Jesus’ Baptism (Matthew 3:16–17)
Big Idea: We lead best when we know we are loved, not evaluated.
Scripture Focus: 1 John 4:16–18; Proverbs 3:5–6
Group Flow:
- Read the Gospel passage aloud
- Ask: What stands out about how the Father relates to Jesus?
- Discuss: How does trust (or lack of trust) affect how we lead our house church?
- Practice: Silent prayer — “Father, where are You inviting me to trust You?”
- Obedient Response: Each person names one small act of trust for the week
Reproducibility Key: Anyone can facilitate by asking questions — not teaching content.
Session 2: Listening — Discerning the Spirit Together
Gospel Moment: Jesus in Solitude (Mark 1:35)
Big Idea: House churches thrive when leaders listen more than they speak.
Scripture Focus: John 10:27; James 1:19
Group Flow:
- Read the Gospel passage
- Discuss: Why did Jesus withdraw to pray?
- Practice: 3–5 minutes of silence
- Ask: What might the Spirit be highlighting for our community right now?
- Share briefly without correction or debate
Reproducibility Key: Silence and listening require no special skill — only courage.
Session 3: Obedience — Love Put into Action
Gospel Moment: Gethsemane (Luke 22:39–46)
Big Idea: Obedience forms character and releases spiritual authority.
Scripture Focus: John 14:15; Romans 12:1–2
Group Flow:
- Read the Gospel passage
- Discuss: What do we notice about Jesus’ honesty and surrender?
- Ask: What small, loving act of obedience might God be inviting us into?
- Pray for courage to obey
- Follow up next gathering with stories, not pressure
Reproducibility Key: Focus on small, doable obedience — not big vision statements.
Session 4: Formation and Multiplication — Living Like Jesus Together
Gospel Moment: Jesus Sends the Disciples (Luke 10:1–9)
Big Idea: What God forms in us is meant to flow through us.
Scripture Focus: 1 John 4:17; Matthew 28:19–20
Group Flow:
- Read the Gospel passage
- Reflect: How did Jesus prepare others to lead and go?
- Discuss the 4 C’s: Confidence, Competence, Compassion, Character
- Ask: Who might God be preparing through us?
- Pray a simple sending prayer
Reproducibility Key: Multiplication happens through invitation, not promotion.
Simple Rule for Passing It On
When training others, remember:
- Keep it relational (questions over lectures)
- Keep it Scripture-centered (Gospels first)
- Keep it participatory (everyone contributes)
- Keep it fun (grace and joy filled relationships)
- Keep it obedient (always end with a response)
If they can lead this conversation, they can lead a house church.
Final Sending Commission
Use this training. Share it freely. Pass it on.
This pathway is designed to move, not stay put. If this has helped you, invite another house church leader to walk through it with you.
As you have learned to trust God, help others trust Him.
As you have learned to listen, help others listen.
As you have learned to obey, help others obey.
And in doing so, you will help form communities that truly live like Jesus in this world.
We’d Love Your Feedback
As you use this training in your house church, we’d be grateful to hear from you:
- What was most helpful?
- What felt unclear or underdeveloped?
- Are there areas where you’d like more equipping or support?
Our heart is not just to share what we’ve learned, but to walk with you as you form disciples and leaders in ordinary spaces.
If you’d like, we’d love to:
- Support you in prayer
- Develop additional tools or resources where you need them most
- Learn from what God is doing in your context
Thank you for helping us steward this well — for the sake of Jesus and His Church.
Therefore, go and make disciples of all the nations, baptizing them in the name of the Father and the Son and the Holy Spirit.
Matthew 28:19 NLT
Igniter Ministries 